You complained, we listened. New bus routes coming soon

A vocal minority of residents have long complained that cars aren’t good enough for them, and that more alternative transportation options are needed. Today, we’re announcing that we’ve heard these minorities and are taking decisive action to address their concerns.

The Office of Transportation has just received our federal funding for mass transit for this fiscal year. While our lawyers work to free up that money for building more roads, the board of directors has just approved the use of at least half of these funds to add nearly 6,000 miles of new bus routes to serve residents who are unsatisfied with our region’s transportation.

The new bus routes have been carefully designed to pick up residents who feel they are too good to drive a car and deposit them into a locale that better suits them. Bus stops are strategically located near neighborhoods with historically low car ownership, and take riders to the new Toyota Transit Hub downtown to allow transfer to long haul buses that will ferry riders to their choice of Chicago, Washington DC, Portland, Oregon or New York City. These one way trips are free of charge, funded by what our lawyers assure us is a “technically legal” use of federal transportation grants.

We expect that investing in these new bus routes will reduce the number of people in our region without adequate access to safe, reliable transportation.